When the Screen Turns Mean: The Real Costs of Cyberbullying
- privcombermuda
- Oct 9
- 4 min read
“Calling somebody else fat won’t make you any skinnier. Calling someone stupid doesn’t make you any smarter. All you can do in life is try to solve the problem in front of you.” – Cady Heron: Mean Girls
In my opinion, I grew up during the golden age of teen movies; Road Trip, American Pie, Van Wilder, The Princess Diaries. Yes, even the Princess Diaries. Each of these movies are arguably definitive cinematic masterpieces in the mind of a young man whose diet primarily consisted of KFC and Mountain Dew. Despite the obvious demographic target audience of many of these films, there was one that I unashamedly enjoyed: Mean Girls.
Mean Girls was hilarious to me. It influenced my yet-fully-developed frontal lobe to believe that some teenage girls can be absolute assassins with their words. They had an inexplicable gift to manipulate words and social order in a manner that could reduce the most stoic of individuals to self-doubting puddles of embarrassment. This was embodied perfectly by the character of Regina George. Her weapon of choice? The infamous “Burn Book”.
The “Burn Book” was filled with gossip, personal attacks, and cruel notes about various people within the film’s high school. It ruined reputations, friendships, and caused chaos. Now, imagine the contents of that same book being promoted and shared amongst hundreds, thousands, or even millions of people across the internet. That is what the modern world now recognizes as cyberbullying.
Cyberbullying and other forms of digital harassment take what was once isolated to the schoolyard and enhances it with digital permanence and worldwide reach. Be it online forums, social media, group chats, or online gaming, this harmful behavior can take the form of a digital scarlet letter that follows a child everywhere.
The Personal Impact
Cyberbullying is more than just ‘kids being mean’. It can lead to mental health risks that result in elevated rates of depression, anxiety, and even self-harm / suicidal thoughts. The Journal of the American Academy of Psychiatry and the Law, using data obtained from the Center for Disease Control and Prevention, shows that “14.9 percent of adolescents have been cyberbullied, and 13.6 percent of adolescents have made a serious suicide attempt”1.
Because online cruelty is public and persistent, victims often experience a loss of control over their own image, identity, and sense of safety. Every uploaded photograph or post that receives a slanderous like or repost cuts deeper. Such negative online interactions with the content that we upload can live on in searches and online history; thus prolonging the trauma for, potentially, an indefinite period of time.
The anxiety and trauma that can result from such online interactions can be devastating for young people whose self-esteem and self-worth is still in the formative years of their lives. Such interactions can result in the victims withdrawing, not only from online spaces, but simultaneously withdrawing, physically and emotionally, from their family and friends.
The Privacy Impact
One of the key reasons that cyberbullying results in a traumatic experience for many young people is due to the total loss of privacy. Innocent selfies become doctored photos that expose children in compromising positions or environments. Highly sensitive personal details like nude images, sensitive text messages, and traumatic experiences that should never be exposed are now available for the world to see. Private messages are screen-shotted and shared for judgement by those committed to disregarding context and consent, and fake accounts are used to damage a child’s reputation and self-esteem, with the effects lasting long after the creator moves on. Cyberbullying magnifies these breaches to the point where online harassment and bullying becomes more than cruelty; it becomes a scarlet letter that can potentially be carried into adulthood.
What Can Be Done
Parents & Educators:
Be a safe space and advocate for your children. Keep communication open and encourage your children to share their experiences.
Teach them how to use security controls at their disposal: Block, Report, and Support.
Stress the value of limiting the personal information that they share online.
Children:
Save evidence (screenshots, chat transcripts) only for the purpose of reporting and verifying abuse or privacy violations.
Don’t engage directly: Block, Report, Find Support.
Lean on a trusted adult. Never feel that you must face these matters alone.
Policymakers & Platforms:
Offer reporting systems that are faster, stronger, and promote action.
Be empathetic to concerns & transparent with enforcement.
Design with privacy as a default; protect children as a priority rather than an afterthought.
Conclusion
In “Mean Girls”, Regina eventually lost her position at the top of the social order once the ‘Burn Book’ was exposed for what it really was: cruelty in the guise of entertainment and fun, and it was eventually destroyed at the end, but digital cruelty rarely dies out. It’s simply replaced by the latest attack on the next victim.
Cyberbullying isn’t just a matter of hurt feelings. It’s a matter of privacy, safety and permanence. We need to protect children from these online threats in the same manner and with the same seriousness as we would if they were happening in person, and part of that starts with giving them the tools and privacy safeguards they need to fight back against the ‘Plastics’ of the world.
Nakia Pearson is the Visual Content and Training Officer for the Office of the Privacy Commissioner for Bermuda. He has seen The Princess Diaries more times than he cares to admit.
Further Reading and Sources