Protecting Kids From Digital Predators
- privcombermuda
- 4 hours ago
- 3 min read
“I don’t like talking to people I know, but strangers, I have no problem with.” –Larry David
When I was 22 years old (about 2 years ago), I had just purchased my first desktop computer – a massive Gateway pc. Dial-up internet speed meant an hour to download a 500kb image of my favorite football player – yeah, let’s go with ‘football player’. Guardrails? Non-existent.
That’s when I discovered chat rooms; the prototype for what we call social media. No profiles, no photos, just strangers with strange screen names. One such screen name, ‘Sugar’, reached out to me one evening.
Now, bear in mind, I’m 22 years old at the time. My interests were football and video games, not looking for digital romance. But when ‘Sugar’ sent me an “A/S/L” (Age/Sex/Location – the typical online greeting of the day), my ego inflated. Further, it had to be a girl with a name like ‘Sugar’; surely a name that sweet could only lead to a sweeter girl, right? So, I replied, asked for a photo, and waited for the pixelated download.
The reveal? Not a sweet young woman. Not a woman at all, in fact. The image that I saw was disconcerting enough for me to take the details to my eventual grave. I nearly ripped the concrete out of the wall trying to disconnect the cable. That jarring ‘expectation vs reality’ moment changed how I approached online interactions forever.
Fast forward to today, and social interactions come with a ton of personal information available: profile pics are a given & locations are visible up front or easily gleaned from photo galleries. It’s difficult to enter online interactions blindly in many cases. Truth is, kids know that the more you share, the more popular you tend to be, for better or worse…
…and so do online predators and groomers.
How Online Grooming Works
When many of us were growing up, “stranger danger” involved unsolicited candy and white vans. In 2025, the stranger now appears in TikTok, Instagram and Facebook direct messages, online gaming squads, and even inside ‘study helper’ apps.
Predators and groomers don’t start their interactions with children with threats; they start with garnering a sense of friendship. With anonymity afforded to online activities, predators and groomers can be anybody. They can be a peer, an older ‘mentor’, or a trusted adult figure. Their candy are likes, gifts, inside jokes, and a feeling of belonging and connection. Over time, trust can become control, and children may be coerced into sharing photos, personal details, or worse.
Why Children are Vulnerable
Teens and children crave connection. Through online spaces, it is easy to generate the illusion of safety and a false sense of security. What’s so bad about an innocent text or image being shared? However, this is a simple digital tactic that lowers one’s defenses. Once you add the pressure to fit in, you now have an opening for people with ill intent to take advantage of.
What to Watch For
Is your child suddenly secretive with their mobile device and/or online activity? Are they more withdrawn from in-person friendships and social experiences? Predators and groomers like to isolate kids with the idea of a ‘special’ relationship or connection – that only they can and do understand your child. They even develop specific ways of communication via unique phrases and references that only they and your child know the meaning to. Such activities are not simply for sexual exploitation. Many children are indoctrinated with harmful thought processes and behaviors that can become a part of their actual identity offline. Sudden changes in outlook and the expression of radical views should lead to significant cause for concern.
Practical Steps for Parents
The best weapon isn’t technology, it’s trust. Make conversations about online connections normal and frequent.
Encourage kids to share ‘weird’ and uncomfortable interactions without fear of punishment.
Review your child’s friend’s list. Are there people there that you don’t know? Are there adults who interact with your child publicly on social media who have no discernable reason or connection to do so?
Examine your relationship with your child. Are there things that hinder open communication and trust? Unresolved conflict or trauma? Children will gravitate to the people who make them feel heard and safe: regardless of their familial connection.
The truth is, the internet is full of meaningful interactions and communities. However, it only takes one ill-intentioned person to turn it into a toxic situation. Modernizing the concept of ‘Stranger Danger’ isn’t about instilling fear, it’s about creating awareness, protection, and keeping children safe.
Nakia Pearson is the Visual Content & Training Officer for the Office of the Privacy Commissioner for Bermuda. He no longer downloads images of ‘football players’ .😊
Additional Reading